Long days roll in like floods and wear at the workings of the soul.
The heart aches at absence.
The mind picks and claws for meaning.
I wait for you.
You don’t see me anymore behind the other things that draw your gaze.
I am lost to whisper
I will not allow silence to steal my voice.
Inside I am a lion.
Loneliness is lost in the presence of the comforter.
He is enough.
God of all goodness, breathe on us today.
In mercy we find new beginnings.
In love, we find rest.
In you, we find peace.
Blanket our souls with the wonder of who you are
And we will find shelter in you, our comforter
I woke up this morning and realized I’d given someone else my keys. Carsick and reeling, I’d been riding shotgun through my life, driven there by my own complacency. Like Dante, I was lost in a dark wood. A spectator barely gazing at the circumstances that brought me to this place, suddenly awake to the fact that I was so far from the path I’d started upon.
The first step on the journey back is waking up, then begins the regaining, the takeover of myself in that moment when the fog has lifted and so have my eyes. Happiness comes from the deliberate life in which I take the wheel and follow truth, peace within allowed freedom from the choking vines of fear. I had no one to blame but myself for allowing them to overtake me.
Hope springs from accepting where I’ve been and deciding to move forward. Hope flows from deep within, the place where the glory dwells. Today I choose to embrace it and fight. Tomorrow I’ll be a little closer to home. In the end, I will win.
Sunlight in her hair, the girl in the long white dress walks slowly
Away from me
Toward her future
Where destiny and maturity culminate in a moment
Where dreams begin
Starry eyes look upon her love
She takes his hand and makes a vow
Little girl I carried in arms
Twinkle, twinkle light above
Carry her on
To where she’s held by you
Make them one
As I pray daily
Grateful always for being her mother
There are so many words in the world trapped in ice, (the icy chill of the frozen heart…not to quote Disney or anything). The past changes us like a bad song trapped in the brain – an earworm playing the tired melody so long it takes over songs of grace. In tragedy, I forget to clear it. I just keep adding new dissident chords to the same melody and unconsciously sing along. But I’m growing tired of auto-repeat and ready to start again.
I’ll pick up my guitar and write a new progression. A “C” to open my eyes to truth, a 2minor to build the tension of something to come, the “F” chord to forget the failures as I rise to find the “G”, the savior God who lifts me higher away from the noise of the diminished chords that used to haunt with their oddities. It’s time to find a new tune for the foundation of my heart.
New life begins the moment we make a choice to let it spring forth from the ashes. Maybe the old remains to make us who we are but we can choose where we land. The decision is ours to move forward or wallow.
Sure, yesterday may repeat itself in subtle ways as circumstance we can’t control creeps near attempting to draw us back in to the rhythm of the madness, but we are the hands that ultimately control the strings. Will we choose to create something new or continue to settle for the old?
Why remain stuck in the old when each string holds within it, the potential for more…the promise of greatness undiscovered. Lord, give me your ears and let me hear the songs you sing over me. Help me to keep pressing forward guided by the beauty promised in your love.
I’m ready for freedom. I’m ready to embrace what you have for me. I know change is hard but nothing is worse than standing still. I promise to embrace new life as long as you keep singing…A pen in the hand of a ready writer. Move with skill and dance as I follow.
My breath pushes too heavy upon my chest; my lungs overtaken by some unseen force alien to me.
In an instant all hope spills like beans from a bag burst open…suddenly scattered…useless.
I am altogether undone.
At the end of me, there’s a place I didn’t know about before.
It’s like a stream hiding deep in the forest waiting for a visitor.
Then all at once it moves and I hear the bubbling of water breaking on the hard rock of my heart.
It hurts and I grow weary with myself.
I can’t say why I didn’t conquer the rapids years ago.
I guess I thought they’d become a distant memory lost beneath brighter things.
God doesn’t heal in part; He’s after everything.
Beneath the cracking of the surface, there’s a grace that won’t leave me standing there half finished.
There’s persistence in the movement of living water through human nature.
Refusing to leave me broken, the process continues.
I rise from beneath the surface, alive…nevertheless, not I, Christ in me.
Hope of glory, don’t leave me alone tonight.
Sometimes life is like a storm
Wriggling, writhing over the face of the deep
Waves with motion fast…furious conquering the soul of the doubter
Another crash, hard and heavy on the face of the water
Breaking with foam and frenzy
Too easily pulling us under
Sometimes life is like a storm
When belief rises, overpowering fear
We become soldiers armed with faith
Hope springing from the word of testimony
Instead of riding the wave, we part the sea
Instead of falling under defeated, we rise above
Sometimes life is like a storm
Pressing onward we charge against the enemy
Taking back all that was stolen
Obliterating doubt
Sure and confident in who we are
Fully assured that we are his
Storm on faithful ones
You’ve got this!
At the end of the day, I can rest knowing that I did all I could to stand when the daylight and dusk collided. When the sound of feet on pavement pushed resistance against my longing…when the straggler dreams long into the twilight and the voices fade, deep and gnawing at the heart of me…I hold this hope assured in love. As the conquerer’s hands grasp tight to mine, lifting my head higher to behold the place his glory dwells. Ah, rest is found there. When his voice blares loudly the song of the ages and I find arms willing to wrap me up in grace. Comforter covering me whole.
Tonight as my eyes burn to close, I will remember that in Him I live and move and have my being and that tomorrow is another opportunity for greatness. Now I rest assured, confident and safe in the embrace of the ultimate comforter. And the world turns on and the play continues. I am found here where today gives way to tomorrow.
Ear pressed to chest
listening
heartbeat consuming
in moments known as “now”
all fades to dim
but the light of this space
the light of eyes
shining brightly with love
moved
breathing you in
sweet caress of hands lost in skin
in moments of you and me
drifting to dreams
nestled safe in arms
love reminding me that we are one
union of souls in covenant
forever combined
forever committed
forever one
I’ll never turn away
Lord, let my hands be ever ready to serve.
Give me your eyes to see the broken and your balm to bring comfort.
Let the voice of my will be silent when your mouth opens
Let me guard my motivations so the outflowing of my heart and hands are pure
May I never be afraid of risk or movement
May wisdom lead as I submit to follow
Let love be my beacon, strength come from my weakness, truth be my anchor and peace go before me
You increase as I find myself hidden in the wonder of your grace
Take all of me and use me
Have your way as I remain forever grateful.
INSPIRED BY THE COMFORTER 