supermom

A Note from Bionic Me

/ Jaimie / Leave a comment

I love a good challenge. I love to learn and absorb new things around me. I started using a new computer program today that I’ve never used and had to force myself to stop messing with it, because I have other things to do and I can learn more later. I often think I can do anything (within reason). At least in most settings.

I find myself wondering today if this is one of those situations where my greatest weakness is my greatest strength overextended. Let me explain. Sometimes the things that make us great, can be pushed too far and end up being our downfall. For example, I’m very compassionate and empathetic. This is a strength. But, when I allow my empathy and compassion to drive in some situations, I can be a giant pushover and let people walk all over me.

When it comes to my bionic, superwoman, learn it all, be the fastest, do better, mentality, I am really good at a lot of things. I’m an excellent employee, friend, singer. I want to be the best I can be so I work until I get it done. This is a strength, but in light of the gospel, this can be my downfall. See, God isn’t likely to be too impressed with my valiant strides towards greatness. In fact, he resists arrogance and pride and sent His son to die for mankind who had spent thousands of years trying to prove they were good enough, only to find they needed a better way. Jesus is that way!

God doesn’t expect me to be superwoman, yet I will try like mad to show Him how capable and “good” I am. I was reading in Genesis 11 this morning. Man says, “Come, let us build ourselves a city, and a tower whose top is in the heavens; let us make a name for ourselves” Gen 11:4. The key phrase here is “let us make a name for ourselves”. They were doing the exact thing we all do sometimes, trying to do things all on our own and prove how great we are.

If you know the story, God decides to confuse their language and scatters them all over the earth so they wouldn’t try that again. The place is called Babel, which means confusion (It’s also the beginning of Babylon and you know Babylon ended up taken God’s people captive and even shows up ago in Revelation). The point is, when I try to prove my worth and be good enough, it only makes me captive to confusion and exhaustion. But Jesus came so that I can have life and rest and peace and FINISHED the work on the cross. That’s all I need. If only I could learn once and for all to REST in that.

Don’t let your greatest strengths get out of balance and become your greatest weaknesses. Don’t work so hard you forget to live. Don’t let your arrogance get in the way of the freedom and blessings that you don’t have to earn…they’re freely given. Let your faith and His strength be enough.

From your friendly neighborhood Bionic woman. (I was named after the bionic woman by the way, but that’s a story for another time.)

Memoirs of a Superhero

/ Jaimie / Leave a comment

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I’ve been distracted…

I’ll admit that I’ve often been impressed with my supermom ability to be able to juggle multiple tasks at once. You moms will know exactly what I’m talking about. It’s those moments when we’re on the phone, cooking dinner, cleaning up, folding laundry, watching our kid who wants to show us his/her latest amazing trick, refereeing the argument brewing between the older siblings while managing to sneak a kiss or two from our spouse. All the while, it doesn’t even seem to faze us. It’s what we do. We were designed to be perfectly capable of accomplishing multiple things at once before our “going batty” sensor starts to blip. It’s life.

Somehow in the midst of it all, we find time to spend with the Lord. We meditate on his goodness while doing the dishes. We worship in the car. We pray in car-rider line. We read the Bible daily. It’s essential to our survival; so we make sure we keep our life line stable and we’re off and running. Even more surprisingly, we manage to teach our children the value of this.

My pastor’s wife once told me that a mistake many moms innocently make is that the only time they read the Bible is when the kids are asleep. This makes perfect sense because it’s the only time there’s peace and quiet to really focus, but the problem lies in the fact that then, our children never see us reading the Bible. I’d never thought of that until then and I quickly shifted my schedule so that though the majority of my study happens before they are awake, I spend time in the word in front of them as well so they know it’s a priority in my life.

I’m still doing all of these things. My household is running smoothly. I’m grounded in the word. I’m praying. But I’ve been feeling disconnected.

I attribute this distraction to the fact that I found out about a month ago that I’m expecting baby number four. My husband and I and the kids are all excited. We know that a baby is a blessing from the Lord. “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, The fruit of the womb is a reward.Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth. Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them” Psalm 127:3-5. I am so thankful. For the record, my husband is amazing! His reaction to the news was a little shock at first and then he pulled me close and prayed a blessing over me and our new baby. It doesn’t get better than that. But I digress.

I feel as though, my brain and body have been abducted by my hormones. I can’t focus. I’m so tired that I accomplish everything five times slower. My once superhuman multi-tasking skills have been reduced to blank stares and “huh?” It’s bizarre. What I fear the most is that I will let go of my life line. I remember when my other kids came along; I had to focus so much on them that I lost some of my focus on the Lord. I don’t want to make that mistake again. I’m trying to be patient with myself and realize that I’m still indeed human and God doesn’t demand that I be supermom or super-Christian or super-worship leader. He just wants my heart. My heart is His.

The scripture that I keep returning to is:

“The Lord your God is in your midst, The Mighty one, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17

Then this morning I read this:

“You are my hiding place; You shall preserve me from trouble. You shall surround me with songs of deliverance” Psalm 32:7

While I am running around down here striving with all my might to keep it all together, God is in my midst delighting in me, rejoicing over me with gladness and trying to quiet me with His love. He doesn’t want me working myself to the point of exhaustion (which isn’t too hard these days) in an effort to keep everything “perfect”. He wants me to chill. He wants me to hide in His presence and find my strength there.

I’m a singer and I’m passionate about it. I long with all my heart to hear the songs the Lord is singing over me! He is singing songs of deliverance and songs of rejoicing over ME! I think instead of striving, I’m going to practice listening. Who knows, maybe someday, I’ll get to hear those songs if I quiet my heart and head enough. Either way, I choose to rest in His love. I choose to enjoy my children, my husband and this new gift growing inside of me. I’ll even rejoice in the morning sickness!

Every good and perfect gift comes from above. It’s our job to acknowledge them and rest in His presence.