wonder

Sing for the Light

/ Jaimie / Leave a comment

Call me into the deep where you are waiting

I’ve missed the feel of you

My head can hear you and my sensibilities know you but my emotions have fallen out the window.

Who have I become that my emotion is absent?

I was passion now I’m passive and that isn’t enough.

I don’t want to live in a world without feeling

It doesn’t satisfy

Reason is enough in a world of black and white but let’s be real we live in prisms

It isn’t enough for me.

I need the sunshine and the breaking of light over dim

I need to feel it

It’s who I am

And I’m not alone

We need to feel

Emotion carries us through the mundane

A world without feeling is nothing but muted strength struggling to hang on

I want to feel the daybreak

And cry when the light strikes the perfect pose

I’m not alone

I can feel it

So sing with me seekers and cry out for the dawn

It’s coming

Hang on tight

Earth meets Sky

/ Jaimie / Leave a comment

earth meets sky

I’m looking forward to the point where Earth and sky meet wondering if that’s the place you’ve chosen as a footstool. What will it be like on that day when I can reach out in glorified body and touch the hem of your garment for myself? What will it be like to see a beauty earthen eyes cannot fathom? I know the sun would melt into vapor if you would release the fullness of your glory, yet I will see you face to face.

You are too great for me!

You blink and heaven and Earth bow to fade as the shutter flashes photograph and I stand in awe. Majesty seems such an understatment.

I reach for your finger like a babe grips his papa.

Lead me to the place where your glory dwells.

On Days When it Sinks in

/ Jaimie / Leave a comment

You know that feeling when something hits you? I mean REALLY hits you! Those moments of clarity when something you’ve heard a million times suddenly is alive with meaning. I think of Isaiah’s words in Isaiah 6 when he says “I am undone”. The gravity of what God is doing or has done finally sinks in with all of the weight of glory it carries and I’m left “undone”.

look up

Today, I heard a rendition of the classic hymn “How Great thou Art” by Stuart K. Hine. I’ve sung this song countless times and still do break it out in a moment of impulse when leading worship. I KNOW this hymn. Yet today, as I heard the third verse, it grabbed me by the spirit and pulled me into a new state of awe at the wonder that is my God.

“And when I think that God His Son not sparing, sent Him to die, I scarce can take it in. That on the cross, My burden gladly bearing, He bled and died, To take away my sin”

I know you’ve heard it before. I know it seems simple.

I scarce can take it in…

There is a God. I’ve met him. He’s wonder beyond definition. He breathed the stars into being. He spoke and the earth took shape. His hands molded man. Every cell and system was imagined by him. Every hair on every head is numbered. No tear or smile escapes his gaze. The universe declares his praise with vastness we can’t fathom. Numbers don’t go high enough to measure him. Words, as much as we love them, can’t even begin to fully describe him.

Yet, he loves me though I’ve done nothing to earn acclaim. Though I am dust and water breathed to honor him and have failed so many times. Though I have turned away and forgotten time and time again. He sees me, a prized creation, a masterpiece.

His son not sparing…I scarce can take it in…

Turned

Turned

It pleased him to take my burdens, my shame, to reconcile me to himself. He considered it joy to bring me peace through his suffering. “For it pleased the Father that in Him all the fullness should dwell, and by Him to reconcile all things to Himself, by Him, whether things on earth or things in heaven, having made peace through the blood of His cross” Colossians 1:19-20

And now I stand…free…not by works of righteousness which I have done, but according to His mercy He saved me. (Titus 3:5) Every sin banished forever, taken away and remembered no more. Every mistake no more than a memory.

I scarce can take it in…

Every now and then, it hits you…those moments when you realize what the gospel really means. Those moments when I realize once more how great he truly is. I am undone.

Flyboy

/ Jaimie / 1 Comment

20130220-174452.jpg Flyboy finds a shell and sends it soaring helpless into the surf. He knows he can cause it to skip and skim instead of sink. When it disappears deep, he finds another and begins again, each time adjusting his angle, the spin of his wrist, the speed and thrust.

Finally, he looks up to Dad for an example. As the shell, gracefully leaves his hands, Flyboy watches with wonder as it jumps three times before falling deep.

Flyboy believes he can be just like daddy. He sees shell skipping on water in his mind and knows he can do it. Frustration is short-lived and only causes him to look up for instruction.

IMG_0211I pray I look at life just like Flyboy…knowing I can do anything…knowing when I’m sinking, I can look up. I pray I never lose the wonder of what surrounds me. I pray I always remember that I can fly. IMG_0253 IMG_0256

I wonder

/ Jaimie / 1 Comment

I wonder if there is a haven for lost poems deep in the recesses of time…some magical place of calm & noise all jumbled together to form meaning.

I wonder if there’s a mystery to the soul that will never be solved until we meet our maker and then in His light, all will become clear, like a translucent breath given form and substance beyond its particles.

I wonder if there are places where two & two add up to three.  You know…like me & you & we.

I wonder

I wonder at wonderful and it’s subjectivity, how the universals collide with perspective to form the moment when “it is good”

I wonder what happens to our dreams when we wake

I wonder what the substance of a prayer looks like from heaven and if mine have created something of beauty or a blob of selfish ambition. I pray the former. Still I wonder

I wonder about today, if I’ve lived it well or if it’s joined the overflowing tombs of the wasted.

I wonder if God allows “the wasted” to resurface in the mind & heart of those who are quick to hear.

I wonder if I can join that number & revive the moments of truth I’ve squandered.

I wonder if I should stop writing now, if maybe I’m digging too deep and will be found buried tomorrow beneath the pebbles of thought that pile to gravel in my head.

I wonder if this makes sense at all.

Some things I may never know…still I wonder.