life

The Secret to Peace

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walk on

I hear his sweet voice from behind the door. A squeaky, tired, “mom”, queuing me to come near quick. He stands in the middle of the bed looking at me with those tired eyes; bed-head pointing in each direction. I smile as he runs towards me. Wobbly feet carry him along, one resolve motivates his movement. He must get to mommy!

This same pattern repeats throughout the day. I work on my laptop on the couch as he plays with blocks. I print to the wireless printer across the room. The noise startles him as foreign sounds fill the room. He jumps to his feet suddenly and runs to my arms. Later, the thunder claps as the afternoon storm rolls in (if you’ve ever been to Florida in the summer time you will understand the severity of a little afternoon thunderstorm). The house shakes and rattles as he leaps into arms, safe and sound, secure knowing I’m near.

He, at 15 months, knows the secret to peace. Somehow it falls out of our awareness as we grow, older, wiser, more independent but the principle remains. True peace is found in the knowledge that we are loved and secure in the arms of one bigger and stronger than us. True peace is found in trust and surrender. It’s harder for us. The art of growing allows us to learn to believe in and rest in the arms of one unseen. Through faith, we know we are held. We often settle for comfort from other sources because it’s easier to lean on something with skin on. But skin fails, hearts grow weak and weary, wisdom falls victim to selfish ambition. People may fail us, but we are safe! We can be perfectly secure in the knowledge that there is one who never fails and He loves us more than we can fathom.

So today when your fears rise up and the thunderstorms rage and the rooms grow dark and you feel alone, call out. Run to the arms of The Lord. He is always near! He will never fail! He is completely trustworthy! Just as I smile and comfort my little one, He longs to comfort you. You are not alone!

Who’s in Control?

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reactive

Reactive, by definition is the tendency to react or to be characterized by reactance. I think most people I know fall into the category of chronic reactors. We so often relinquish control to others or our circumstances. We see it in the lives of those terrified to move because they are so afraid of what others will think. We see it in our relationships as we react in anger. We are driven by words hurled toward us by careless humans, who unwittingly (or with intent), bite with condescension or malice. We are so easily wounded and broken. We are selfish.

Ben Carson says in his book Take the Risk,

“The more rights you think you have, the more likely someone is going to infringe upon them.”

“It wasn’t until I backed off enough to take myself out of the center that I realized reactions like that [anger/negative reactions] were not signs of strength, but rather indications of weakness. Such reactions meant I was letting other people, the environment, or circumstances control me, and I decided I didn’t want to be so easily controlled. But if I took myself, my rights, my ego, my feelings out of the center, I couldn’t be.”

“Once I was able to take myself out of the equation, to look at things from other people’s perspectives and not feel that all the rights belonged to me, the things that could make me angry were suddenly few and far between.”

When we are brave enough to stop thinking about ourselves and put others first, we may find that we gain the power and the freedom that we’ve been searching for. No one can hurt us if we don’t let them. All it takes is the wisdom to know that we are loved completely and fully by the creator and we can move beyond reaction to freedom and begin to go beyond “me” to “them”. Be free today!

 

Messy

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Messy

As I was cleaning up smashed strawberries and bananas off of the floor under my son’s high chair this morning, it hit me…not just the peaches he was chucking at my head…also the realization that life is messy. There’s really no way around this fact. Sure, I’m in the thick of it, with four kids at home and a full-time job and ministry obligations. There’s always something more to be done and some inner voice telling me I’m not doing it all well enough. But I think all of us have an element of “mess” in our lives. It’s that stuff that always comes back, the house, the bills, the relational problems, whatever it may be.

I, for one, tend to rail against the mess hoping if I grimace enough, it will all go away and sparkle in the radiant light of my annoyance. This approach rarely works. Go figure…The better approach would be to realize that the mess has purpose and accept it. The mess serves to make me better and if I’m better at the end of the day, then it was all worth it.

For me, the mess tends to ‘mess’ with my psyche. I am my own worst critic. Consequently, I can be so hard on myself when the mess is too grand for me to tackle in a day. Sometimes, I find myself on my knees in the morning scrubbing day old fruit like this morning, as today’s peaches fly like rockets. And that’s okay.

There’s an odd little story in 2 Kings chapter 2:23-24. Elisha was going about his day and some young dudes decided to mock him and call him “baldhead”. Elisha turns around and looks at them and curses them in the name of the Lord and bears come out of the woods and eat them up. Elisha just keeps on going to where he was headed. Weird right? I’ve heard a lot of commentary on this passage, and honestly, I never thought too much about this passage and just attributed it to Elisha being sensitive about his receding hairline. Plus, how dumb to mess with the man of God! Today, I’m thinking a little differently.

We all have those things that we are sensitive about. Mine is my inability to “properly” quell the messes that confront me. I fight with myself regularly as my internal accuser tells me I’m failing. Today, I’ve learned to stop arguing and just pull an Elisha. When the mocker comes, I can stare it down and curse it in the name of the Lord. I can do this because I know who I am. Elisha was so much more than a bald guy. I am so much more than my mess. So I can boldly stand at the edge of the woods that would seek to drag me down and bury me deep in shame and insecurity and I can call on something higher than myself to deal with the problem. I don’t need to fight my own battles, I need to rest in who I am in Christ and keep going.

I don’t know what mess is mocking you today. It could be flying peaches, anger or even addictions, but I do know this, there is a defender who loves you deeply. He will help when you call upon his name. You never have to face this life alone. I pray your day is filled with cleaning, smiles and bear calling…and those flying peaches may be sticky, but don’t let them bring you down.

Love your Enemy

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Shoot

We are told to love our enemies
My greatest enemy is me
I fight against my will and my brain when they try to make me give up or over think

I fight against my doubts that would try to name me unloved
I wish I could call myself perfect but what a boring journey that would be

We are told to love our enemies
My enemy is the past
Pain felt long ago that tries to resurface at the mention of my failings
I kill it again with the sword of truth and silence it’s nagging
But I know it will return
It’s a battle I’ll fight but it’s a battle I’ll win
I am more than my past
I am an overcomer

We are told to love our enemies
So I muster up the strength to give myself a little grace
I thank God for the opportunity to live and grow and push on a little farther
I choose to be thankful for who I am and where I’ve been and all I’ve learned along the way
I know it all brought me here
To you
To now
And I am complete

Life Beyond Comfort

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When the comfortable numb ceases to be comfortable, we can choose to escape and join the living or we can choose to delve deeper into denial. It is possible to stuff feelings into caverns we visit only when useful for some advantage. We can justify the remnant with clever notions about self preservation. But to truly feel is an adventure for the bravest of souls. To live deeply unafraid of the breaking takes resolve and courage.

We continue steadfast into the fray while the waves of life beat us hard into jagged edges of rock and earth. We continue to focus on prizes unseen though our eyes flinch to blink at offenses hurled at us headlong.

We will not be silenced when the night begs for songs of praise. We will not grimace at the need set before us as we offer more than what logic compels us to bring to the table of the hurt and lonely or sick and tired.

We will look past the present to the hope of glory when all seems stacked against us…when the walls we’ve built crumble to dust around us…when our towers of achievement turn to pillars of salt good only to season us with grace.

We will fight passed normal to the place where life begins, where we end. The place where our plans give way to his purpose.

There we will find the fullness of joy.

Secret Place

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I had my own private spot in the woods where two trees had fallen together creating a little seat just right for me. I would sit there for what seemed like hours singing and praying. It was there that all seemed right with the world. It was there, in my secret place, that I found my solace, meaning…peace. It was there that I began to know God. There, God could be felt, His presence overwhelming my soul. It was almost tangible. It filled the air like fragrance, the sweet incense of grace, permeating my heart until all doubts disappeared. Those moments in my secret place shaped my life forever.

It’s easy to forget when we’re running. There are kids to wrangle, clothes to wash, meals to prepare and we are spinning in circles wondering where the day went. Chasing after daylight like the last shadows melting away too soon. Yet, in the midst of the madness, the lover of our soul has prepared a place. It is there, in the middle of it all, that He waits, knocking softly on the door of our hearts. It is there, we can find our rest.

All it takes is a moment in His presence to ease the ache of overused feet. One moment with Him and all that seems too much becomes just enough because He is enough. Search for Him today. Find your secret place where He calls to you. Dance with Him as He rejoices over you with singing. Run with Him through flowery fields. Sit with Him on the dock and watch the sunset. Wherever He calls, answer and you will truly live.

Today

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When the waves crash hard and my toes grip the sand and I wobble at the weight of the blow,

I remember that to keep standing I’m going to have to move,

Adjust to the shifting of the earth beneath me and trust that the waves will reside and in their place something new will emerge.

Today, I will be awake.

Today, I will stand on the shore of my life, look to the horizon and be what I was purposed to be.

Tomorrow will take care of itself if I remember to care for today.

 

Autopilot

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eagle_flying_bird

Autopilot – when I go through the motions

Head down, resolved, ready to do whatever it takes to make it happen

And then I sometimes break as resistance pushes me to realize I’m not built to maintain; I’m built for greatness.

Not greatness I’ve built with the persistent efforts of my hands, but greatness that comes only when I let go of my ambitions and allow yours to take over.

I ask so often for you to take all of me and then I feel injured when it’s pointed out that I can’t do everything on my own.

Why I allow the stubborn me to crawl off the altar of sacrifice and proffer a vote, I’ll never understand.

So today, once again, take it ALL.

Take my rights, my self preservation, my emotions, my ambitions, my plans.

Make them yours and use them for your glory.

I will fix my eyes firmly where they should stay, on the prize of the high calling of Christ.

There my feet find wings and fly, above the clutter, into your presence.

There, I find peace.

Blue skies

Growing, We do it Everyday

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Big Boy

Baby Man’s first tooth emerged to surface last night. It was another rite of passage into “big boyhood”. The signs keep coming that he is growing so quickly. He is zooming through infancy with lightning speed while we crawl around with him on the living room floor hoping to savor the moments. He still sweeps me off my feet with each giggle and that smile that lights his eyes and melts my heart.

I am just a mom. There are days when I leave for the office without realizing that I haven’t brushed my hair. There are nights when I forego cleaning dishes for cuddles and cluster nursing. I’ve traded makeup and high heels for slobber and bare feet (baby slobber…not mine, in case you were worried). My concerns in the morning are now, did everyone brush their teeth? Lunchboxes? Backpacks? Is everyone in the car? Wait, I’m missing one. There she is….let’s go.

And I love it!

God is a Father and I’m convinced He loves it too. Think about what He has to deal with on a day to day basis. Yet, He’s there cheering us on when we grow a little and we cut a spiritual tooth. He’s holding our hands and helping us learn to walk along. He smiles when we look up at Him with toothless grin. He scoops us up in His arms when we fall down and cry out for help. He forgives us when we get into something we shouldn’t. He’s never frazzled and overwhelmed like me.

Maybe it’s like they used to say when I was young, “Babies having babies”. I didn’t appreciate hearing that when I was in my 20’s, but now I can laugh and look upward at my Father who is so patient with me and appreciate the wonder of it all. I’m just a baby trying to figure it all out with my babies in tow…and I’m growing everyday.

I can toddle along the best way I know how. I can follow my Father and never let Him out of my sight. I can fall and learn and get back up. I can be secure knowing that even in my baby steps, He’s celebrating with me. He doesn’t demand perfection. He knows I’m learning. He will never leave me or forsake me.

So, today I’m celebrating a first tooth and the realization that I am right where I should be, in the hand of a loving God who gave Himself to bring me life. A savior who sacrificed everything for me. I’ll let Him lead me as I lead these precious one’s He’s trusted me with. It’s a good life when He’s in charge!